How much could I charge for a seminar to teach people how to look for things on the internet using a search engine?

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You may think I’m kidding but I’m dead serious.

Or maybe the President of the United States could pay me to do a national public service announcement campaign explaining how to do it. 

What would I need like a 30 second spot on all the major networks on how to point your computer to Google and type the words of the subject that you are looking for and then hit the enter button.

Is that even 30 seconds?  Maybe I could speed talk my way through it in 15 seconds and we could buy double the air space.

 

This is but one question of about the 20 emails I get a day asking me to find things that had been on the blog a previous day or last week-

Recently you posted sista felicias recipe for haddock chowder.  I failed to keep it.  Can you please send it to me?

Thanks

My response-

Good Morning :)

Try this

go to this site-

https://goodmorninggloucester.com/

then go to the top right corner where the search box is.

once you locate the search box type in “Haddock Chowder”

I bet you find the recipe.

Alternatively you could go to www.google.com

Once there you could find the search box and type in goodmorninggloucester haddock chowder

I bet that would do the trick as well.

have an awesome day

Now if I took my time to respond this calmly to every person that asks me on a daily basis to find something that had been on the blog before I’d never have time to actually produce any content.

What I wanted to do was tear what little bit of hair that I have left out of my scalp and scream because I just can’t understand how hard it is to perform an internet search or what the disconnect is that people are unwilling to perform one.  Is it possible in this day and age when Google is one of the largest companies in the world and part of the Fortune 500 that people don’t know it exists or what it is for?  It is clearly obvious that that disconnect exists for a huge number of the population.  Otherwise I wouldn’t get 20-30 emails a day asking me to find previous posts for people.

This is why the Government giving me a ginormous grant to do a PSA on how to perform internet searches would be probably the best money they ever spent.  Think about the productivity gains you would get from educating what my conservative estimate is 20% of the population who do not know how to search the internet for what they are interested in.

Please for the love of god, help spread the word of this thing called Google- so that all of mankind will benefit and middle aged balding bloggers will be less inclined to tear what little hair they have left on their head out.

Please and Thank You.

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About Joey C

The creator of goodmorninggloucester.org Lover of all things Gloucester and Cape Ann. GMG where we bring you the very best our town has to offer because we love to share all the great news and believe that by promoting others in our community everyone wins.
This entry was posted in GMG Tech Talk, Rant and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to How much could I charge for a seminar to teach people how to look for things on the internet using a search engine?

  1. What is amazing is that it is even better than you think. I hardly ever use the onboard search window since Google has categorized Good Morning Gloucester as a “very hot site must update google searching metrics every five minutes.”
    Case in point: if you search for the string “How much could I charge for a seminar to teach people how to look for things on the internet using a search engine” with or without quotes the first hit in google is this article. You could take any six words in order from any article in GMG and find it instantly.
    For an old dog who finds it hard to learn new tricks I find myself doing things the hard way when easy is so much better. But I can change.
    One more Fun Fact. If you google “Peyton Manning gargles moose balls” or just “Peyton sucks” you get over 1.2 million hits which is basically the number that google spits out when it really is 50 bazillion hits.

  2. hedge says:

    Can you email to me that article on how to do searches for articles on your blog? I misplaced it.

  3. Pat Dalpiaz says:

    GMG has not gone soft :)

  4. hedge: Now that’s funny.

  5. Ginny Dillon says:

    Hi Joey,
    I recommend you make use of one of my favorite links … as needed
    http://justfuckinggoogleit.com/
    Hope this comes in handy.
    Warmest Regards,
    Ginny Dillon

  6. Dave Moore says:

    Googel is used big time this way and by many – now ask yourself where they get all that. Where a Googel 20 years ago could have really used it -googel – googel http://www.google.com/corporate/history.html :-)

  7. gregbover says:

    I Googled “why don’t people use Google” and learned that some don’t know how, as you surmised, and some crave the human interaction of your direct answers. Technology is still a frightening thing for many, it seems.

  8. Anonymous says:

    Try this:
    http://lmgtfy.com/
    It’s “let me google that for you”.

  9. Huff Post had a great article on cool stuff you can do with Google – anybody who doesn’t learn how to use Google is really missing out – http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/02/03/google-search-facts_n_4697542.html

  10. Anonymous says:

    What really makes me crazy is when people ask me to find something and I offer to show them how and they say, “Oh, I’m not computer literate like you are. Just find it for me” or, better yet, ” I don’t want to know how. Can’t you look it up for me?” which is basically the same answer. No, I won’t do it for you but I will walk you through it – ONCE. AAARRRRRGGGHH!!

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