Tag Archives: Poop

Everyone Poops

Hmmm.  See now, I always thought the concern was too much excess during the holidays.  Maybe the saying is, too much excretion during the holidays.

After all, Everyone Poops, right?

Even the snowmen and the reindeer, I suppose.

I’ve been known to go a bit overboard during the holidays.  Jingle our Elf  on the Shelf has gotten into a fair share of late night mayhem, carrot peels have been scattered by reindeer with poor at best eating etiquette, Santa’s cookies have been crumbled and dipped into his mug of milk for that “eaten on the run” kind of effect, letters to Santa have been “mailed”, videos from the Portable North Pole have been delivered, and reindeer food has been sprinkled on the lawn. Special reindeer bells have even been wrapped in boxes just like those that appear in the Polar Express and placed far back under the tree for the boys to find last.

Lies, deception, and holiday fun at its best.  All of that having been said, however, you won’t find me throwing around snowman or reindeer poop anytime soon….or feeding it to the kids.

“Ho! Ho! Ho!  Sorry the reindeer just had to go 

I’ll be singing this all week now.

“Dumpity, Dump, Dump,

Dumpity, Dump, Dump,

Look at Frosty go”



“I love the look on the non-defecating eagle’s face. “

Hey Joey,
Happy New Year!  I snapped this photo today at the Roger William’s Zoo (AMAZING place fyi…open all year and 1/2 price in January + February).  Timing is everything.  I love the look on the non-defecating eagle’s face.  I could almost hear him saying, “Nice, really nice.  Way to represent.”     :)
-Nichole Schrafft


Poop and Lysol- The Poll



I’d just like to throw out there the premise that the smell of fresh poop masked unsuccessfully by Lysol is far more offending to the senses than straight up poop.

Am I wrong in my thinking here?

Like if you just laid down a monster turd why not own up to it rather than try to mask it with that god awful Poop/Lysol smell mix? It’s offending to the person walking in after you and it’s offending to the masterpiece you left behind in the can.

Has this ever happened to you?  You’re waiting to relieve yourself and the bathroom is occupied. So you sit there patiently waiting and then the perpetrator walks out of the bathroom.   You walk in an immediately get smacked in the face with a waft of nasty poop/lysol aroma so pungent you feel like Mr T just gave you a Dirty Sanchez.

You drop to the ground commando style and try to work your way out of the bathroom on your elbows like a GI ducking for cover on Omaha Beach, trying to duck below the cloud of agent orange-like nastiness left behind only to discover it’s inescapable.  You’re surrounded by it like the boy in the bubble and now you’ve only got two choices- soil yourself or stand up and inhale in all that poop/lysol aroma.  It’s just burning out your nostrils and leaving you dry heaving your way out of the bathroom, light headed and ready to pass out.

I’d like to propose to parents across the US- please teach your children the proper way to take a dump-

Finish your bidness, wipe til you don’t see any brown on the TP and then wipe a couple more times to make sure, wash your hands with soap and water, grab a handful of paper towels to dry them off and use the same paper towels to open the door so your hands don’t touch the bacteria laden bathroom door handles, stick out your chest and just flat out own that poop.

Pass on the Lysol. It’s just flat out more natural. Haven’t you ever read that book as a child- Everybody Poops?  Poop- Natural.  Lysol/Poop- Not Natural.

Anyway, vote in the poll-