Outrage! Monopoly Cuts Iron Token and Adds Cat Token (undoubtedly at the hands of crazy emotionally unstable cat hoarding women)
From CBS Boston this morning-
PAWTUCKET, R.I. (AP) — Scottie dog has a new nemesis in Monopoly after fans voted in an online contest to add a new cat token to the property trading game, replacing the iron, toy maker Hasbro Inc. announced Wednesday.
The results were announced after the shoe, wheelbarrow and iron were neck and neck in the final hours of voting that sparked passionate efforts by fans to save their favorite tokens and businesses eager to capitalize on publicity surrounding pieces that represent their products.
The vote on Facebook closed just before midnight on Tuesday, marking the first time that fans have had a say on which of the eight tokens to add and which one to toss. The pieces identify the players and have changed quite a lot since Parker Brothers bought the game from its original designer in 1935.
Rhode Island-based Hasbro announced the new piece Wednesday morning.
Let me state for the record that this is a horrible idea on many levels. First off just think about how poor Scottie the Dog token feels about this development. Alone at the top of the heap and now this johnny come lately kitty cat just saunters on up and weasels their way on the board.
Then there’s the whole classic angle of the game. Monopoly is a classic, no doubt about it. I feel strongly you should never tinker with the classics.
Only a crazy single woman harboring tons of cats in her apartment would think this is a good idea. Oh and along that vein and pardon my little tangent that I’m about to take here but I think that you’ll agree it’s a tangent worth taking-
Warning to all single men out there-
If you’re out in the evening and get invited back to a woman’s apartment for a “nightcap” and once you get inside the apartment, anticipating to get all up in her business- no matter how hot she may be, no matter how intelligent she may seem or how much you two seem to have in common-
If she’s harboring 3 or more cats- RUN! Don’t look back. Just run!!!! In my experience from back in my bachelor days every one of these multiple cat hoarding single broads are batshit crazy (and I don’t mean batshit crazy in the I wanna tie you up and play sex games kinda kinky way) I mean batshit crazy in the emotionally unstable kinda way.
So bringing this post back on topic I’m assuming that the majority of people who voted for the cat token to replace the classic iron token are batshit crazy emotionally unstable single cat hoarders.
And is that who you really want making decisions about who decides the fate of your classic board game tokens?
I think not.