Tag Archives: doritos


Violet Gray submits-

Hey Joey, 

My brother Chuck, (formally your parents paper boy) turned Hollywood Actor has not one but two entries that have made it into the semifinals of the Doritos Crash The Super Bowl contest. 

This link explains the contest

This is Chucks submission:


This is another submission featuring Chuck as lead Pirate:


Chucks self styled press release:

Former GDT Delivery Boy Bite Into Show Biz

My name’s Chuck McCarthy. I grew up in Gloucester and delivered papers for the GDT. My sister Violet lives there still, and my father lived there up to his death. He also delivered papers for the GDT and was very active in local and state politics. If you knew him, you may have been put off by my email address… as he is dead and wasn’t very good with computers when he was alive.

Stupidest Thing I Did Today

Went to grab a sub at the supermarket as I was in a hurry and on the way out of the store picked up a bag of Doritos.

I haven’t eaten a bag of Doritos for at least a year.

I feel disgusting.

What a waste of calories.  Empty- disgusting- make your breath bad- disgusting calories.



What makes it worse was just last week when I took Snoop Maddie Mad out for some special father-daughter time we were at a restaurant and this guy with pleated dress slacks and a royal blue shirt sits down next to us with his dinner- two hot dogs, two cans of regular pepsi and a bag of chips.  The guy was a total mess with greasy hair and a huge gut and slight shoulders- just carried all his weight like a tire made out of crisco right around his waist. 

All I  could think of was how the guy had totally given up on life.  No pride, not even trying.   Like if it was one hot dog, one can of regular soda and a bag of chips that would have been one thing.  But nooo, straight up two hot dogs, two cans of soda and a bag of chips.  I’m sorta surprised he didn’t double up on the chips.  May as well at that point, right?  Like if you’re trying to kill yourself live it up man, just fill out the two way shit trifecta and double up all the way around.

Seriously.  Two hot dogs, two cans of sugar-laden pepsi and a bag of chips?  Have some respect for yourself.  You know the whole your body is a temple saying and all that?

I shoulda known better than to pick up that bag of Doritos.

I won’t make that mistake again any time soon. Believe that!

Stupid Joey