Category Archives: Pimp!
With the number of Kickstarter campaigns spiraling into the stratosphere I’ve decided to launch my own Kickstarter campaign for the very first dedicated Vajazzling Studio In Gloucester.
Let’s be honest, if Short and Main can raise $22K to pay for a Pizza Oven, my drumming up the dough for a Vajzzling Studio should be a no-brainer.
If Duckworth Bistrot can enter a contest for a new door, if EJ can pull off a Kickstarter for her Owl and The Pussycat book, if some crazy cat lady can get a felt costumes for kitty cats project funded, then there’s no way in hell we would fail in our quest to raise enough dough for a fancy local Vajazzling studio.
It’s all the rage. Screw this lobster business crap. Stinky bait, angry lobstermen, early morning start time and long hours vs Vajazzling coochies for a living. Hmmm this is not a very difficult decision.
I’ll just need a back up man to take care of the not-so-attractive patrons. Paulie Walnuts is looking for work. Bingo! Paulie Walnuts and me Vajazzling coochies all over the North Shore.
Help me make my Vajazzling dream a reality. Look for my upcoming Gloucester based Vajazzling Kickstarter campaign which will be forthcoming. I will offer many levels of pledges starting with base level backers and working our way up to more comprehensive “rewards” for more substantial backers.
Short and Main offered a $100 option for-
Receive a signed copy of Food & Wine’s latest cookbook, “America’s Greatest New Cooks” featuring Nico and Amelia Monday. You’ll also receive a menu from opening night and a thank you video from Matt in his lobster suit.
Hell I’ll toss in a signed GMG DVD, a couple Homie Stickas and a video of me in a monkey suit singing the start spangled banner for a hundred bones.
Disclaimer: woman I live with and may or may not be related to through marriage will not be pledging.
If Jennifer Love Hewitt is all in for Vajazzling it’s good enough for me.
If this works out (and obviously it’s money in the bank) we’ll get Kim Smith in there to penizzle up dude’s man-parts.
We could take over the world Vajazzling and Penizzling women and men all over the North Shore.
Over/Under on the amount of time before we see a Kickstarter project for the Paint Factory project offering people the right to come in and paint or landscape the joint for a mere $100,000?
I’m saying within six months and I’m taking the under.
PSA for all the single ladies and men out there-
This shit right here is textbook what not to do the night you meet a potential date.
Too soon call back right after they met? check
Drunk as fuck? check
Guy makes up excuse that he has indigestion to get away from crazy chick? check
Girl has to be what, an 8+ to even consider the call back based on this phone call and even then only a booty call right? But under those circumstances it can’t be worth it based on this level of crazy. I mean this is the amorous drunk chick, can you imagine the psycho version of her after the guy drills her and doesn’t call her back?
If last night’s video didn’t prove that he is the most talented man shooting and editing video on Cape Ann I don’t know what would.
Bottom Line. End Of Story.
Thanks Kim Smith for your awesome videos, thanks Farm Bar and Grille for hosting us. ALWAYS A GREAT TIME!
Woke up yesterday morning to a flock of Pink Flamingos in the front yard. Figured they were for the Mrs but nope. They were for me according to the card. Who’d like to fess up to being the Flocker?
The Details (also available on The Event Facebook Page Here)
Shot and Edited By Kim Smith
We’ve Got Balls. Dodgeballs That Is… Come To The Dodgeball Harlem Shake Taping/Registration Party At The Farm Wednesday Night!
The GMG/ Farm Bar and Grille 3rd Annual Bikini Speedo Dodgeball Tournament. This Year having outgrown the capacity of The Farm Bar and Grille and being Held At Camp Spindrift This Saturday at Camp Spindrift
All the info can be found at the event Facebook page (you don’t have to have Facebook to view it)-
Dodgeballers and Friends of Dodgeballers Don’t Forget to Come To The Farm Wednesday Night To Pick Up Your Dry- Fit Technical T-Shirts and Registrations Bring Your Uniforms for Approval and Get In The Harlem Shake Video we’ll be taping Wednesday night!
The event itself will be held at YMCA Camp Spindrift in West Gloucester. They have an ideal facility to accommodate this event as it grows. Parking will be at nearby Wingarsheek Beach and there will be a shuttle between the parking lot and Camp Spindrift.
On Wednesday, March 13th at 7pm there will be a COMPETITOR’S PRE-EVENT MEETING at the Farm Bar & Grille in Essex, MA (233 Western Ave). The purpose of this meeting will be to give the athletes their tshirts and wristbands, as well as go over the rules of play and verify athletes’ age and make sure swimwear is all legal. At least one person from each team should be present. The idea here is to make everything run smoothly on the day of the event.
The Farm Bar & Grille and Good Morning Gloucester together with YMCA Camp Spindrift present the 3rd annual outdoor bikini/speedo dodgeball tournament to benefit Next Step, a charity that provides aid to children and young adults with life threatening illnesses (www.nextstepnet.org)
You know I pride our contributors on being on the cutting edge providing you with the news way before anyone else.
But then you have our boy Fred Bodin just really swinging for the fences yesterday with this bold prediction in the comment section-
I have a sickening feeling that this could be a big one.
Really Fred? Whoa!!!!!!
Now I don’t know about you but he just totally blew me out of the water with the balls to make such a bold prediction.
Nostradamus? Puh-Leeeease! The Oracle- Ain’t Shit.
We got Fred MF Bodin, sticking his neck out with cutting edge, hard hitting, ballsy weather analysis right there.
I mean how could he ever have deduced that we’re getting a major storm? There was nary a mention of it all week long on the news, facebook, or twitter. The guy is the prognosticator of prognosticators.
I’m just glad we have him on our team. Sheesh. Guy is a weather forecasting monster.
Here’s Fred working up his latest weather models-
Some Photos From Ed’s Coronation As President of The Cape Ann Chamber Of Commerce Board of Directors
You know normally I’d start out a photo montage mostly about Ed with a photo of Ed but The Photo of The Night Was of None Other Than New Chamber CEO Robert Heidt Getting His Groove On-
Robert’s just going for it right here! Feelin’ It! The Music Last Night From Henri Smith to the Runaround Was Easily The Best Music Ever Played At Any Chamber Event I’ve attended! Killed It!
aaaand then there’s all the rest of the pictures Felicia took…
Sorry we didn’t have more photos from the event, we didn’t bring out the good camera and we were having too much fun dancin!
When someone tries to explain to you fashion, after you make the comment “I just don’t get fashion shows” show them this shit.
Glosta being Glosta Baby. You Can’t Fake The Funk!
Fish designed By chris williams and jon sarkin
Paul Morrison Contemplates Rubber Duck Pasties For His Upcoming Male Revue Act While At The Dock To Pick Up His Midnight Sun T Shirt
I’m doing a little clean up around my desk on my last day at work before vacation and I find this bag containing some hair club for men bullshit!
Very funny, verrrry funny. When I find out who is responsible for this just remember that the big boss man has final editorial control over this here blog. You wanna mess with me?
It’s bad enough living with this male pattern baldness without having to be reminded of it with not-so-subtle hints of cheapo “thicker, healthier looking hair” products being left around your workspace.
Oh the humanity.