I don’t want to sound dramatic About The End Of Western Culture Beginning With U12 Girls Soccer, but I Totally Think It Is


The ABSOLUTE 100% highlight of my week is getting to watch my daughters play soccer.  I LOVE the place where they play –Danvers Indoor Sports.  It is clean, well run, and an awesome modern place where the kids can get their sporting activity on even in the dead of winter.

But I’m afraid that the place where my favorite thing in the world to do has now succumbed to the idiots that have brought us participation awards instead of tournaments where there are winners and losers.

A couple of weeks ago the scoreboards stopped keeping score.  The timers worked just fine, but when a team scored a goal, it didn’t register.   Among the parents we just assumed that the scoring system where the ref changes the scores was broken.  But yesterday we found out that it was a conscious decision to stop displaying the scores because people were getting too charged up over the scores and because… feelings.


Are you kidding me?????? 

We’re just gonna stop keeping score now??????  I can’t, I really really really can’t believe that this is a thing.   I’m so beyond disappointed that this is the direction people want to go with the youth of America.  So soft.  So beyond soft.

This is craaaazy.






  • When kids are little, I think it is ok to give a trophy for showing up, but eventually kids need to understand that trying your best even without an award is important.


  • I think this is stupid too Joe, but I think Danvers made the decision not because of “feelings.” It was more because some parents and coaches were getting out of control – yelling at refs for bad calls, yelling at kids for bad plays, etc. There’s really no excuse for an adult to scream at a 10 year old kid for a bad play on the field. If it were my decision I just would have ejected those coaches & parents. The kids are fine with wins/losses. It’s the adults who lose all perspective.

    If you want to see crazy, stop by one of our men’s soccer games at Danvers Indoor on Weds. nights.You would think we’re playing for the World Cup. 45 year old guys screaming and threatening to kick each other’s asses over bad calls. It’s insane.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I’m not sure what bad behavior by parents or coaches has to do with not posting the scores. I agree, if a parent or coach yells at a ref or a coach they should be ejected for sure


      • It’s because some parents & coaches get crazy of the scores. Like if the kid’s team loses by a goal, it’s the end of the world, and that justifies screaming at the kid or the coach or the ref.


        • I’d never scream at a child over sports. I judge my daughters on the effort they put in not if they win. If they win but they are lollygagging around the pitch or not going in the corners to try to defend as well as they can then they are told that they didn’t have such a great game. If they lose but they keep fighting all the way til the last whistle, they are told in the car they played a good game. Best case scenario they put in 100% effort and win but obviously that’s not going to happen all the time. That being said if the parents are yelling at a coach or a ref there should be a zero tolerance policy and they should be ejected from the facility. This IMO doesn’t have anything to do with the score being kept. I just fail to see the correlation. I’m into the games cheering loudly but I’d never yell at a ref or a coach.

          Liked by 1 person

        • You haven’t seen the bad ones then – I have coached soccer for many years. Some of the most horrible people have showed up to berate and belittle refs (most of whom are only teenagers) and even drop F bombs on their kids about how they’ve screwed something up or can’t play goal or whatever. Taking the score away from those people theoretically calms them down – they can’t really bitch about a bad call or a loss if there was no loss.

          Like I said, I would love to have the scores back and I think it’s stupid to take them away but I have seen the dark side & I can understand why Danvers might make this decision.

          Liked by 1 person

        • Well you’ve had more experience on the bench, I guess I’m lucky to not have experienced seeing a parent yell at their child at a game.


  • Well not keeping score misses the point. A game is a game. Take away to me is to figure out what you can do better next time or how the team can better work together. I don’t get it. I’m damaged but it is not because I got the ‘Worst Throwing Arm’ award on my small town little league baseball team! 😉


  • Maybe instead of shutting down the scoreboard, they should ban the parents? Adults need to learn how to reel in their emotions. It’s a GAME, and just because things aren’t going your way doesn’t give you the right to blow a gasket and act in rage – least of all in a fashion that ends in someone’s death. What sort of example does this set for your children, or the other kids who are participating if the parents, cannot practice good sportsmanship? Winning isn’t everything. What has become of that part of the lesson? The Junta case was truly a low point for the youth sports community and still the bad behavior continues… When will we ever learn?


  • Little league I played for ward 7 then Lanesville behind the plate and right field can be slow at times and the sunsets at plum cove distracted me some – if you having fun and enjoying that’s what it’s all about! 🙂 Dave


  • The solution is to prohibit parents from attending the games.They are the problem!!! Helicopter parents who think their kid(s) is the next SUPERSTAR . Or are they reliving their past through their kids because they sucked at everything when they were young and probably still do.


  • Thanks for this post, Joey, and for posting the response from the Danvers Indoor Sports Lady about this. I’m with Andre on this one.

    This isn’t about giving sportsmanship awards to pampered kids. The Danvers Indoor Sports people are trying to do anything they can to correct the bad behavior of some soccer parents. Our son’s been playing at Danvers Indoor Sports for three years and the behavior of some parents is awful. Ban some individual parents? They’ve done that. Not allow some teams’ parents to be present during games? They’ve done that, too. This is another step they take because some parents get so caught up in their 10-year-old kids’ Saturday night game that they’ll scream and swear at refs, coaches, other parents, their own kids, and even other teams’ players. The parents get the most frenzied at the end of a game when there’s a tie score and they’re desperate for a win. It’s insane. These are 9- and 10-year-old kids! The idea is that the parents will be less frenzied if there’s no visible score. It’s a rational response by Danvers Indoor Sports to irrational parental behavior.

    We Gloucester parents were at a game last year – yes, at Danvers Indoor Sports — when parents of the other team began screaming at one of our 9-year-old boys for a play he made on the field. The boy was crying after the game because a bunch of adults he didn’t know were yelling swear words angrily at him through the glass. After the game, it escalated when the other parents called us dirty because we’re from Gloucester and told us to “go back to our stinking fish city.” Our friend Liisa Nogelo from Magnolia wrote about it here:

    This isn’t about that boy not being tough enough. It has nothing to do with the kids at all. It’s about a few parents and a step the arena is taking to try and fix their inappropriate behavior.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Well from what I’ve heard from other parents that have older children and have coached longer than I’ve been watching, it DOES happen. I guess I’ve just been lucky enough to not have witnessed it.

      That behavior on the part of the parents is obviously outrageous but at the end of the day the parent that is THAT over the top into the game is also going to be aware of the score whether they post them or not. Just like how so many say say the kids know the score without having it posted, the crazy parents do too.

      That’s why I don’t make the jump from posting scores on the scoreboards to psycho parents abusing the refs, coaches or players being cause and effect.

      I appreciate Kelly Cragg writing in to us. His facility and the way it’s run is the gold standard.

      Liked by 1 person

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