This guy is diabolical.
The old get your girlfriend a puppy the day she puts her old dog down from a heart tumor trick. Gets ‘em a hundred times out of a hundred. Well played sir. Well played.
Moral of the story?
Go down to Cape Ann Animal Aid and get you one of those cute cats or dogs, bring it home, surprise your girlfriend, get laid.
It’s just that easy.
PS: Shouldn’t I get a be getting Nobel or Pulitzer for this kind of stuff?
PPS: If I don’t get a Nobel or Pulitzer there shouldn’t there be a bevy of advertising firms straight up fighting to sign me at this point? I dare say there’s never been a more effective ad for Cape Ann Animal Aid in the history of Cape Ann Animal Aid.
PPPS: If the grandfather wasn’t sitting right there I would have said 5 minutes propped up on the dryer.
Just makin’ it rain cats and dogs up in this mother.