Tag Archives: Lobster Roll

Lobster Meat Debate- Tail, Knuckle, Claw. What Ya Got?

If I’m eating straight lobster meat or lobster in a a lobster roll I want a majority of the meat to be tail and knuckle meat.  Claw meat is still good and all but no where near as good IMO as tail and knuckle meat for the simple fact that you get that one section of claw meat out of the skinny section of the claw that is more like sponge like in texture compared to the succulent knuckle or tail meat.

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Which leads me to the lobster roll produced by Luke’s Lobster in New Yawk City.

Photos from http://newyork.seriouseats.com

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Their lobster roll described here-

Whole chunks of lobster claw was stuffed in a top-split bun at Luke’s stand. Each roll was made to order, with a swipe of mayo on the inside, lemon butter and secret seasoning on top.

I’m not gonna go into a wild crazy rant because Luke’s got a lot of things right here and only a few things wrong, the point I ‘m trying to make in this post is in asking you, our viewers, would you be happy with a lobster roll that consisted of all claw meat?

The ideal lobster roll actually consists of meat from all parts of the lobster, if I got only claw meat I’d feel like I was getting jipped.

Let’s poll this to see how you feel-

Rating and Ranting- The Lobster Rolls From Tasting Table’s Lobster Roll Rumble

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There are some real abortions here and yet I was pleasantly surprised to see some purists leave perfection alone and keep it simple.

Here’s a run-down and rating of all 20 Lobster Rolls served at the Tasting Table’s 2013 Lobster Roll Rumble-

I should clarify ahead of time that there can be accompaniments of different ingredients on the side of the lobster roll but in no way shape or form should the crazy ingredients be in or touch your lobster roll.  Let’s get to it-

Click the links for photos of each lobster roll at http://newyork.seriouseats.com/

Waterbar (San Francisco, CA) Rating 8.9

Served on a housemade brioche, and alongside housemade pickles, Waterbar’s lobster roll was made from Nova Scotia lobsters topped simply with melted butter and salt.

Interesting that a joint from frou frou California didn’t get all crazy with stupid rolls or avocado or some other trendy ingredient.  Big points for simplicity and I’m interested in the idea of topping lightly with some sea salt.


The Mermaid Inn (New York, NY) Rating 6.8

A buttered Martin’s potato roll is the vehicle for lobster tossed with Hellman’s mayonnaise, celery, onion, and Old Bay seasoning, and finished with a sprinkling of chives.

Celery- deduction, onion- deduction, old bay seasoning-deduction, chives- deduction.  The Mermaid Inn didn’t get wayyyy crazy off base with those ingredients but they all detract from the star of the show- the lobster. 


The Galley Restaurant and Pub (Naples, ME) Rating 7.3

The Galley served their lobster in a top-split bun, tossed with mayo and with a green leaf lettuce; the lemon salt seasoning on top of this lobster roll gave a zesty bite to the sandwich, the fresh lemon wedge served on the side even more so.

Again, points for staying simple with the classic split top bun.  But hard core green lettuce, and lemon?  You put lemon on fish when you don’t want to taste the fish.  There’s no need to mask the perfection of lobster meat with lemon.


The Clam Shack (Kennebunk, ME) Rating 9.8

As last year’s winner, the Clam Shack had a lot to live up to this time around. They did their reputation proud, using fresh lobster and a sweet roll from Maine’s Reilly’s Bakery, and offering their lobster roll with either melted butter, a swipe of of mayo, or both.

If you’ve read this blog for any amount of time you’ve already been educated on what makes the perfect lobster roll perfect- the simplicity of the ingredients. There’s a reason the Clam Shack in Kennebunk ME won last year, They didn’t go out of their way to fuck up perfection with stupid shit like scallions and paprika and celery and lemon, ect, ect, ect…  Brilliant!


Thames Street Oyster House (Baltimore, MD) Rating 7.8

Using a rich combo of butter-poached lobster and a brioche roll, Thames Street Oyster House served a refreshing cucumber and onion salad alongside their roll to help balance the butteriness.

Cucumber and onion salad alongside.  This sounds like a solid lobster roll from the description but once you click on the link and see the picture you see these fuckers snuck some chopped chives on top there.

Rat bastards, thought I wouldn’t notice, huh?

DEDUCTION!!!!


Red Hook Lobster Pound (Brooklyn, NY) Rating 4.8

The Red Hook Lobster Pound was using a top-split, New England-style bun from Country kitchen, and stuffed it with lobsters tossed with homemade lemon mayo, iceberg lettuce, paprika, and scallions for a cool, crunchy lobster roll.

OK now where starting to get into crazytown territory.  They started out with the split top but but it all falls to shit after that.  Homemade lemon mayo-FAIL, iceberg lettuce-FAIL, paprika-FAIL, and scallions FAIL FUCKITY FAIL FAIL FAIL. What a shamockery. 


L&W Oyster Co. (New York, NY) Rating 2.3

Lobster folded with sriracha mayo and pickled celery root, then served atop arugula and a Parker House roll. A dusting of lobster bottarga and a side of homemade goldfish crackers finished off the roll from this Flatiron restaurant.

You’re kidding me, right www.newyork.seriouseats.com/ with back to back abomination lobster rolls in your lobster roll rumble slide show?

Lobster folded with sriracha mayo and pickled celery root??????  The chefs that entered this dreck should not have been allowed into the building and earned themselves a lifetime ban from all future lobster roll competitions!!!!  Then after they throw the sriracha mayo and pickled celery root they go and kick you in the nuts with ARUGULA?????  Goldfish Fucking Crackers?????

There are no words for the contempt I have for the types of people who go and bastardize the lobster roll I love and hold so dear to my heart as these chef/criminals.  They should be stripped of any culinary credentials once bestowed upon them and sentenced to a lifetime serving cold soup in Turkish prisons.


Lure Fishbar (New York, NY) Rating 5.9

Lure went all-out with their roll, sandwiching mayo-dressed lobster with a strip of bacon and a single potato chip, before stuffing it in a mini potato roll.

Bacon by itself may be only second to lobster by itself.  The two together, take away from each other. I’m not even gonna go into the potato chip on a lobster roll thing.


Lobster Roll Restaurant, a.k.a. "LUNCH" (Amagansett, NY) Rating 5.4

The only contender to offer a gluten-free roll, LUNCH’s lobster roll was otherwise served in a toasted, potato slider bun, and tossed with Hellman’s mayo, celery, and salt.

Listen Lobster Roll Restaurant a.k.a. “Lunch”  I get that you’re trying to be different with your whole gluten-free lobster roll, glomming on to the whole Gluten-Free trend but wasn’t that like 2011 with the Gluten-Free craze? 

You know the people who go around saying that you can make stuff that’s gluten-free that tastes just as good as the stuff that’s loaded with gluten? All certifiable nutjobs.  Every one of them.   You know the saying “Don’t piss down my back and tell me it’s raining?”  That’s the equivalent of some Gluten-Free chef telling you that you’ll never taste the difference between gluten-free cooking and regular traditional cooking.

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a thousand times, the key to a great lobster roll is the simplicity of the ingredients and not going off the rails with some newfangled trendy bullshit ingredient or cooking style.


Luke’s Lobster (New York, NY) Rating 7.7

Whole chunks of lobster claw was stuffed in a top-split bun at Luke’s stand. Each roll was made to order, with a swipe of mayo on the inside, lemon butter and secret seasoning on top.

Not terrible, in fact quite good but I prefer a mixture of claw/tail/knuckle meat to strictly claw meat where you get that one section of claw meat that can sometimes be a little spongy in texture.  A decent showing though.


The Lobster Joint (New York, NY) Rating 6.6

The Greenpoint-based Lobster Joint was serving a New England-style roll, with lobster tossed with mayo, celery, and tarragon, and on a toasted top-split bun from Brooklyn Standard Bakery.

They were doing so well and then they had to go and mess it up with celery and tarragon.

Repeat after me- Leave outr The Paprika, Leave out the Old Bay, Leave out The Tarragon, Leave out the Parsley, Basil, Rosemary and Thyme.  When you get the sudden urge to add any of these ingredients to your lobster roll clamp on some electrodes to your testicles and crank up the amperage to just before your nuts are fried (point being we really don’t want you to reproduce).


Little Market American Brasserie (Chicago, IL) Rating 2.6

The Baja Lobster Roll served by Little Market was a sweeter, spicier take on the traditional. Tossed with chipotle aioli and line with a cabbage slaw, the roll is then topped with chopped chives, tarragon, and a lemon vinaigrette.

I suppose I should be way more outraged but then I looked at where this restaurant was located.  Chicago.  Like the same Chicago whose Blackhawks the Bruins are gonna mop the floor with in the 2013 Stanley Cup Finals.  How can you hate on folks that simply don’t know any better.  If this was a steak rating competition then I’d lay down the lumber on these poor seafood uneducated fools. But they’re from Chicago and since they obviously don’t know any better we will let them wallow around watching our Bruins lay a monster beat down on them while they dine on bastardized ridiculous can’t-let-perfect-enough-alone lobster roll feculence known to man. 



Kittery of Brooklyn (Brooklyn, NY)
Rating 6.8

Using tail, claw, and knuckle meat, Kittery of Brooklyn made an herbaceous lobster roll, served with a generous amount of chopped chives and tarragon and in a toasted New England style top-split bun.

Once again started out strong, tail, claw and knuckle meat but then met disaster with chopped chives and terragon.  there’s worse out there as Little Market American Brasserie and L&W Oyster bar have demonstrated.


Ford’s Fish Shack (Ashburn, VA) Rating 6.7

Ford’s was serving their lobster rolls two ways: Connecticut-style, with warm butter, and Maine-style, chilled and dressed with mayo. Both styles were served on a garlicky, top-split bun from Maryland’s Uptown Bakery, and topped with chives and Old Bay seasoning.

Sigh,  another victim of chives and Old Bay- DEDUCTION!!!!!


Eventide Oyster Co. (Portland, Maine) Rating 3.1

Eventide was serving their browned butter lobster with lemon juice, chives, and salt, and in between a housemade, Chinese-style steamed bun.Softer than most of the rolls at the rumble, the nutty brown butter paired well with the fresh, briny of the lobster.

You have to click on the link to appreciate how messed up the rolls they used for these lobster rolls.

OMG, you can’t make this shit up!!!!  Look at the picture in the link for Eventide’s lobster roll pic.  Observe the Chinese-style steamed bun and join me in belly laughing them way out of the building.  Chives, nutty brown butter, lemon juice- all lobster roll no-nos.  But this Chinese-style steamed bun takes the cake.  Good luck with that wimpy white soggy ass steamed roll holding up.  I pity the fool who has to consume these lobster rolls.

Portland Maine, be better than this.


Ditch Plains (New York, NY) Score 0 (this is not even a lobster roll) Fail

Marc Murphy served the least lobster-y rolls of the night, with a Sabrett hot dog on a Martin’s potato roll, topped with a generous heaping of lobster mac and cheese. With lobster butter made with lobster roe, and American, Swiss, and Parmesan cheese, this roll had all the richness with of a traditional lobster roll.

I suppose I really didn’t have to read anything after “Marc Murphy served the least lobster-y rolls of the night” but I did and lo and behold we go on to find out they’re serving mac and cheese.

Did the rules of the contest say best lobster mac and cheese Lobster rumble?  Uhmmm no.  It was the Lobster Roll Rumble.  If you can’t even get the dish right you really may as well not show up and consider yourself uninvited next year because clearly there are lobster roll purists taking this thing way more seriously than a chef that can’t even understand what the heck we’re cooking here.  Sheesh! 


Cull & Pistol Oyster Bar (New York, NY) Rating 2.5

One of the richer lobster rolls of the night, Cull & Pistols rolls are are first poached in lobster butter, made from a lobster reduction, brandy, and melted butter. The lobsters are served Connecticut style: warm, atop green leaf lettuce on a custom-made Arnold New England roll.

Look at the picture and you’ll see one of the cardinal sins of lobster roll production.  it’s bad enough that you insult us with anything green touching our lobster rolls (this includes celery, parsley, chives, avocado, arugula, iceberg or romaine lettuce) 

The green stuff in the lobster roll is a violation in and of itself but then when you make the ratio of lobster meat to green stuff favor the green stuff????  That’s just plain insulting.  How do you even look at yourself in the mirror after jipping your customers or judges by trying to load up on the cheap stuff to try and fill your lobster roll?  That’s just lobster roll 101 as a lobster roll consumer.  You see more green stuff than lobster meat as a consumer and you know that that chef is a dastardly thief and should never be trusted to prepare you a dish again so long as you live.

For Shame Cull and Pistol Oyster Bar!!! For Shame!!!!


Cousins Fresh Maine Lobster (Pasadena, CA) Rating 8.6

Using the knuckle, claw, and tail meat from Maine lobsters, Cousins’ lobster roll is simply served with melted butter, salt, and lemon juice.

They almost had it!  They were so close but then they had to put on the lemon juice.  Still a valiant effort and especially from a joint in California where as we know from past experience they have a tendency to try to get all fancy and put in strange ingredients

ahem I’m talkin bout you “Broads in California” -

What Is Wrong With People???? Another Lobster Roll Disaster From Some Broads In California

Bite into Maine (Cape Elizabeth, Maine) Rating 6.9

Using New England-style, top-split buns from a Portland bakery, this roll was lined with a bed of coleslaw, fresh lobster meat, then drizzled with butter and salt.

Once again, very close, but deductions for coleslaw in the bun.  How hard is it to keep that stuff off to the side so you can maintain the integrity of the bun without it getting all soggy?


B&G Oysters (Boston, MA) Rating 6.5

B&G’s lobster was served on a toasted Pepperidge roll, and lightly dressed with lemon mayonnaise, celery, and chives.

Lemon, celery, chives. Sigh….


The Joey C Lobster Roll Nazi Winner

The Clam Shack (Kennebunk, ME) Rating 9.8

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Brilliant, Stunning in it’s simplicity, congratulations Clam Shack In Portland Maine!

Check Out New York Serious Eats For The Entire Article and Pictures Here

A Preemptive Lobster Roll Refresher Course Before Anyone Gets All Crazy

I’m putting out this Lobster Roll PSA at the beginning of this lobster season to save chefs from making the horrible dastardly crimes against lobsterdom that so many make each year when they try to go all fancy with their lobster rolls.

One of our lobstermen, Dave Jewell’s boat was originally christened as the KISS.  Chuck Kersey built it and explained the meaning behind the name-

KISS- Keep. It. Simple. Stupid.

What I will suggest to you is to take the name of the lobster boat which Chuck Kersey christened and apply it to your lobster rolls.

You don’t want to end up in the list of lobster roll debacles like the ones we’ve chronicled through the years here on GMG-

oh-no-you-didnt

Bastardized Lobster Roll on Tap Today At Gloucester Gourmet

Posted on June 26, 2012 by Joey C

What Is Wrong With People???? Another Lobster Roll Disaster From Some Broads In California

Posted on July 11, 2011 by Joey C

The Broads Out In California Try To Defend The Undefendable

Posted on August 16, 2011 by Joey C

What Does a $50 Lobster Roll Look Like???????

Posted on December 21, 2010 by patrickr

Grandma Ethel Needs To Put Down the Crack Pipe

Posted on July 19, 2011 by Joey C

IDIOTS!!!!!!!!

Posted on June 25, 2009 by Joey C

Uhmmmm The World’s Greatest Lobster Roll Just Got Even Better By Subtraction. You Heard Me- Subtraction.

2012-09-08 19.47.10

You’ve heard me rail on about the world’s greatest lobster roll for four years now.

We’ve dismantled countless frou frou high brow chefs and food bloggers who couldn’t leave perfection alone and had to go and mess up the perfect lobster roll with such atrocious ingredients as paprika, celery, lettuce, relish onion, pickles, avocado and such ridiculous platforms for rolls such as French baguette rolls and anadama bread.

Yu can read about all those abortions these dopes tried to pass off as lobster rolls here-

How to F^@K Up a Lobster Roll -For The New Readers

Grandma Ethel Needs To Put Down the Crack Pipe

The Broads Out In California Try To Defend The Undefendable

IDIOTS!!!!!!!!

Bastardized Lobster Roll on Tap Today At Gloucester Gourmet

But what I’m about to tell you is going to turn a lot of what I’m saying on it’s head I guess.  Or another way to look at it is actually more accurate in that as I’ve told you from the beginning- that simplicity and not overthinking the lobster roll and it’s perfection is the way to go so simplifying in the way I’m going to explain actually falls right inline with what I’ve been saying.

Night before last the Mrs asks me to bring home some lobster so she can make lobster rolls.  She tells me she wants to try something different than her traditional recipe.

I brought home 5 lbs of medium shell lobster and she made two lobster rolls based off her original recipe-


Ingredients For The Worlds Greatest Lobster Roll

Posted on April 28, 2008 by Joey C

Ingredients For The Worlds Greatest Lobster Roll, originally uploaded by captjoe06.

Has to be Cains mayo, and hot dog rolls so you can grill them to a golden brown with the unsalted butter.

Notice there is no lettuce, paprika, celery or any other filler. If anything else appears in your lobster roll, you have an inferior lobster roll.

steam the lobsters and shuck the meat

tear the meat into 1/2 inch chunks or so and mix with cains mayo

refrigerate

once lobster and mayo is chilled, butter each side of cheap hot dog rolls (the kind you tear apart)

you do not want to use any goddamn baguette or crusty overpowering roll

you want white bread tear apart soft hot dog rolls

once you butter the sides of the hot dog rolls with SALTED butter you pan brown the roll so its warm and golden brown

just barely browned but the roll should still be very soft

then load up your cool lobster/mayo filling into the warm soft buttery roll and you have yourself the perfect lobster roll

note- NO  LETTUCE- NO  CELERY-NO  PAPRIKA- NO FANCY CRUSTY FRENCH ROLL


I’m here to tell you that there is an upgrade to this and it is by simplifying.

Leave out the mayo and serve with hot drawn salted butter drizzled over the top of the cooked lobster meat inside the grilled buttered bun.

It actually intensifies the taste of the lobster instead of masking a bit of it with the mayo.

It’s now the official recipe of the World’s Greatest Lobster Roll.

#Boom!  That Just Happened!

2012-09-08 19.47.16

Best lobster roll pictured in back.

Bastardized Lobster Roll on Tap Today At Gloucester Gourmet

I don’t even know where to begin on this atrocity- and in our own back yard, a local.

I will say up front Anadama bread on it’s own- Fantastic. 

For the love of christ, not on a lobster roll.  and then to add lettuce and celery??????

I see what you’re doing here Melissa Abbott, you’re trying to get inside my head.  You’re taunting me.  Saying I know how I’ll get Joey C to feature my blog on his site.  I’ll bastardize the one thing that there can not be any dispute about in an attempt to explode his brain.

It’s lobster, it’s tradition.  Why do we feel it necessary to mess it up.  Can’t we all agree that Andama bread is OUTSTANDING for French toast.  I’ll even go as far as to say it’s THE BEST bread on the planet for French Toast.  But please get that shit away from my lobster rolls.  It’s an outrage.  It’s an atrocity.  It’s unforgivable. 

www.GloucesterGourmet.com ?  Uhm you may want to rethink the title of your new blog to www.GloucesterNoYouGourmet-not.com

I can’t go on.  I’ve got a headache.  People, want to let Melissa know what’s up here in this latest of all crimes committed against tradition and all that is good and sacred in the lobster world.

Look at this bullshit would you-

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photo from www.gloucetergourmet.com a demonstration on how to mess up a really good thing

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Lobster Salad Sandwich on Anadama Bread with Garden Red Leaf Lettuce

her ingredients-

Lobster Salad Recipe
Fresh Lobster Meat slightly chopped
Freshly chopped celery  FAIL
Cains Mayonnaise
Red Leaf Lettuse from my Garden FAIL

It’s simple people- The split top bun.  Not Baguette, Not a goddamn Panini, not a Saint Joseph’s roll and No, Not on Anadama bread.

A split top bun in which you slather on the butter and grill to a golden brown, then you add the cold lobstermeat mixed with a dollop of Cains mayo.  That’s it. Nothing green, no paprika, no celery, no onion, no pickle no other frou frou bananahead ingredients. 

How many times do we have to go over this?

Don’t out-think tradition.  Don’t out-think perfection.  You’re gonna go and mess up the lobster roll’s good name because you’re jumping the shark on this, trust me.

Congratulations Melissa You Made It To The Big Time- A Feature On GMG

Customers at Surfside Subs At Long Beach Prepare To Dig Into Lobster Rolls Made With The Mrs’ Recipe

Stuff you won’t find on a Surfside Subs Lobster Roll- Anything green including lettuce or celery- or some kind of frou frou baguette roll.

Stuff you will find- Captain Joe and Sons Lobster, Old School Split Top Roll, Buttah and a dab of mayo.  Owner Matt Olson knows the key to the perfect lobster roll is the simplicity and not complicating a good thing.

They do it right!

Follow Surfside Subs on twitter – @Surfsidelb

 

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Go get one and tell ‘em Joey sent ya.

Surfside Subs Doing The Lobster Roll the Right Way

Notice the lack of celery and lettuce?  Notice the split top butter and grilled bun?

This is what’s up!

Surfsidelb Surfside Subs on twitter writes-

@Joey_C Here’s the Surfside lobster roll. Made with avocado and served on focaccia. Kidding! pic.twitter.com/zH9iiODq

Surfside Subs gets my lobster roll seal of approval.

Surfside Subs
147 Thatcher Rd
Long Beach, Gloucester, MA  01930
(978) 281-1700

Surfside subs website here

Lobster Roll Crisis

Doug Brendel writes-

Joey, thanks again for the 4 enormous lobstahs Sunday morning.
My friend from Ohio, the NYG fan, loved them.
We ate until we couldn’t eat anymore, and had lots of leftovers.
Which my wife Kristina made into lobster salad for lobster rolls.
However, I am sorry to say, she made the colossal mistake of chopping up a stalk of celery and mixing it in there.
But I want to assure you, I have taken corrective measures.
I beat her mercilessly, divorced her, and unfriended her on Facebook.
And after she gets out of the hospital, I’m going to bring her down to you so you can cuss her out and then push her in the harbor.
I’ll let you know when we’re on our way.
Love,
Doug

Prepare Yourself For Another Bat Shit Crazy Fun Filled Weekend In Gloucester- Here’s Your Playbook

I suggest y’all rest up because yet again (I feel like I say this every week) there is an insane amount of fun just about free stuff to do.  Get Ready To Partay!

Saturday September 17th

Downtown Gloucester Block Party

Entertainment:

At 6 pm sharp start dancing to the Docksiders Big Band plus jazz, reggae, African, folk, rock, show tunes and oldies. Linda Amero is at the Franklin Café, the Bandit Kings play at the Dog Bar.  The Honky Tonk Women of Gloucester and we will be performing at 7p.m. in front of the Sovereign Bank.  Enjoy exquisite dancing by OmBellyCo Tribal Dance and the Cape Ann Center for Dance Performance. Buy 50/50 raffle tickets from our Gloucester High School cheerleaders and help support the parties.

Also at 6 pm, a special magic show in Kids’ Town – win a special prize from magician Joe Howard!

GMG/ Lat 43 Outdoor Celebrate Gloucester II Bash To Renew Newell Stadium

Stop by and say hey and let me take your pic.  We will be live blogging the event!

LAT 43 Entrance

Saturday Starting at 7PM

Matt Burke From the Gloucester Daily Times Will be presenting  Awards To the top 25 Gloucester High School Gridiron Greats and we will have photos of the award winners blown up 25 feet on the big screen as Matt gives out the awards.

We will unveil the 25 foot screen that Ed Collard and I conceived and Ed mostly built with help from Sista Felicia and screen Sam Hartson’s “This Is Fiesta” movie- outside hoisted high up on the pilings in front of Lat 43, show footage of the blue lobsters albino lobsters, golden sea robin, Sunday Senior Seine Boat race, Friday Saturday and Sunday greasy pole footage, Monkey Balls, Craig Kimberly’s Fiesta Videos, Faces Of The Fishermen From EJ, Gloucester’s Finast Kind Calendar, and much much more.  The Outdoor café setup in the parking area in front of Lat 43 will be incredibly set up Lat 43 will be practically giving the food away and there will be adult beverage service- NOT TO BE MISSED!!!!!

Lat 43 will be serving Sista Felicia’s Special Hot Cocoa and Peppermint Schnapps (also served without the booze for the little ones) and we will be proudly serving The fantastic Ryan and woods Folly Cove Rum with hot mulled Cider to keep y’all warm through the night.

Best of all 10% of all food and beverage sales goes to GFAA to help rebuild Newell Stadium.

Art Now Rockport

ARTNOWpromoBORDER

Tickets are available for this evening event, please visit www.artnowrockport.com. (The official promo poster is attached to this email.)

Featured artists: Kurt Ankeny, Renata Fryshara, Ben MacAdam, Nina Samoiloff, and Karen Tusinski. Much thanks to Sarah Kelly, Rockport’s very own events guru and all around booster for the arts!

Sunday September 18th

10:00AM

Mug Up and GMG Lobster Roll Competition!!! at Khan Studio Good Morning Gloucester Gallery

Swing by the Gallery at 77 Rocky Neck Ave gallery G3 (On Madfish Wharf)

Meet lots of your favorite GMG personalities and enjoy free coffee, pastries and EJ’s killer deviled eggs.  Bring some pastries if you would like but it’s not mandatory.  Sometimes Paul Morrison even graces us with Monkey Bread!

On Sunday, September 18th during Mug Up, we will be holding the First Annual Lobster Roll Competition.  Judges for this competition will be Sista Felicia (we all know what an awesome cook and foodie Felicia is), Wendie Demuth (who grew up working for her father’s lobster business and ate huge amounts of lobster, prepared in every imaginable way), Brenda Hill (food judge for the International Food, Wine & Travel Writers Association, author and freelance writer from FL, originally from Gloucester) and Kim Smith (butterfly garden and lobster roll expert, who’d better show or Ed Collard gets her spot).  The lobster roll competition will be fierce and require special handling, so we need to have an idea of the number of entrants in advance.  Bun grilling can be done here at the gallery just before the entry goes to the judges, so entrants only need to bring a batch of their filling (hopefully enough to share a little with everyone after judging is complete) and their buns of preference.  If you are planning to enter, please reply post on the blog, or if you want to be more secretive, you can email me at khanstudio@comcast.net.  You might also want to put in a reservation early with Joey at Capt. Joe & Sons for your lobsters.

12:00PM Sunday

The Fish Box Derby On Rogers Street!

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Fish Box Derby Info Here

Sunday September 18th
The Lone Gull 10K

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Runners (and those interested in running),
An email will be sent out to all registered runners sometime tomorrow in regards to the final race details. I will outline some important points below for anybody who doesn’t feel like waiting for the email. This year’s Lone Gull 10K will in fact be its final running. It has been a great five years and I really want to thank all of the runners, volunteers, sponsors, and most of all my family for helping and putting up with my September stress! So here are some details for the race:

1) Pre-race packet pickup is available at New England Running Company on Friday (10-7) and Saturday (9:30-6).
2) You can pickup your numbers and shirts on raceday starting at 7:30 AM at Good Harbor Beach.
3) You can sign up for the race on raceday.
4) There is plenty of free parking available at Good Harbor Beach.
5) We will not be holding on to shirts that have not been picked up so after the race it will be on a first come, first serve basis.
6) Good luck to all runners!!!!!

For more info-

http://www.lonegull10k.com/

Carol McAuliffe Listens to the Voice Of Reason- Produces The Perfect Lobster Roll

Hey Joey

I wanted to share my lobster rolls with you!

You are soooo correct about it being simple!  This is exactly the way your mrs does it and the only way!

They were delish!

I wanted to add it to your gmg site – but don’t know how- so you can if you like!

Take Care!

Carol McAuliffe

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The Broads Out In California Try To Defend The Undefendable

You may remember a few weeks back these very esteemed food writers out in California tried to tackle the Lobster Roll.  Responding to one or two of our problems out of six about the horrible mistreatment of their lobster rolls, they try to defend the undefendable.  I think the Dali Lama himself would consider this cruel and unusual treatment to one of the most sacred of all dishes- the Lobster Roll.

Now they come back out and try to defend this shamockery of a Lobster Roll here-

HOMEMADE HOT LOBSTER ROLL Homemade Hot Celery With a Hint of Frozen Lobster If You Can’t Get Live Ones Recipe

 

IMAGE REMOVED AT REQUEST OF THE BROADS IN CALIFORNIA

***Please do not mistake the image above with anything served out here on the East Coast or for anything we would ever endorse*** 

Check out their recipe at http://chezus.com/ if you haven’t read the funny pages yet today and need a good laugh here- http://chezus.com/2011/08/15/homemade-hot-lobster-roll/

Joey’s response which I figure has a 20% chance of being published on their blog-

God have mercy on your soul.

strike one- frozen lobster meat

strike two- lemon? who needs to mask the taste of the most succulent meat on earth with lemon?

strike three- the golden rule. nothing green should ever touch your lobster roll

strike four- onions, really?

strike five- when you have more celery than lobster meat you know you’ve got a problem

I understand how you are trying to differentiate your lobster roll recipe from others but really the beauty of the lobster roll is it’s purity and simplicity.

Can’t you broads out in California stick to getting all crazy with tofu or sumthin more west coastie?

You’re gonna go and give our lobsters a bad name.  Oy!

or at least rename the title to Homemade Hot Celery With a Hint of Frozen Lobster If You Can’t Get Live Ones Recipe

Have a great day and try not to be late for yoga. Smile

Grandma Ethel Needs To Put Down the Crack Pipe

image

Grandma Ethel’s Lobster Rolls Rock

A Recipe from Island Creek Oyster Bar

lobster roll!

It all started out innocently enough.  It seemed reasonable when you quickly scanned over Granny’s ingredient list and hey, I can even let a lobster roll that has celery in it ride without calling them out but there it was, looming.  The devil in the details-

PICKLES!!!!!!

Ingredients
4 1¼-pound lobsters, steamed
1 c. mayonnaise
½ c. pickles, diced small
½ c. celery, diced small
2 tbsp. lemon juice
2 tsp. celery salt
2 tbsp. kosher salt
2 tsp. white pepper
6 tbsp. butter
8 hot dog buns

She was doing so well.

  • regular hot dog rolls- check
  • butter- check
  • mayo- check

But then the train veers off the tracks

Celery, lemon both no-nos, but the issue which is unforgivable here is glaring- the addition of goddamn pickles to a lobster roll.

Unforgivable.

Once again I will refer to a simply acronym which tells it all- KISS

Keep It Simple Stupid

There is no need to get all crazy just to be different.  You can understand how some bananahead out in California could make this kind of mistake.  But someone from the Northeast?

For shame!

At least it’s not as bad as last week’s debacle from the broads in California who tried to pass off a lobster roll using frozen lobster meat, celery, onions, lemon and jalefuckingpenos.

Or Bucky From Ohio who details a lobster roll made on a French baguette.

Granny must think she has Tiger Blood ala Charlie Sheen if she thinks sneaking such ridiculous ingredients like pickles into a lobster roll is gonna go unnoticed.

Not Here- Not Now Granny.  It’s Lobster Roll  Eatin’ Season and We Ain’t Gonna Let You Lead These Poor Unsuspecting Folks Down  A Lobster Roll Road Paved With Pickles Of All Things!

Here’s how to do it Grannycakes

What Is Wrong With People???? Another Lobster Roll Disaster From Some Broads In California

My buddy Heather Atwood forwarded me this shamockery of a lobster roll recipe.

I honestly don’t know where to begin in a critique.  I could probably do a whole ‘nother blog in addition to GMG with all these recipe’s from people who don’t know how to let perfection alone.

First the a small preview of the mess that  DENISE WOODWARD & LAUDALINO FERREIRA from EAT Boutique display as their lobster roll- (for the full sized picture I suggest you go to their other than the horrible lobster roll post, excellent food blog)-EAT BOUTIQUE!

Now just from the tiny sample of a picture above at EAT BOUTIQUE! you can imagine how any self respecting lobster roll lover would cringe when you see a lobster roll that has more green visible than lobster parts.

Any of you that have been with the blog from the beginning know how I feel about anything green touching a lobster roll.

A quote from my original post from July 3, 2008 as a refresher-

What I found was shocking and disturbing. It seems these mooks up in Maine have found a way to fuck up ruin a perfectly good lobster roll. Listen to me, under no circumstances should the words lettuce, paprika, French baguette, or celery enter the equation when speaking about lobster roll preparation.

So back to the mess in California and the EAT BOUTIQUE! version of a lobster roll.

This quote near the end of her blog post really gives you an idea of how unqualified they are to be writing about lobster rolls-

I like to use a live lobster, but have used frozen lobster tails, when I am in a pinch; both types are as equally delicious.

Really now????   You’re gonna go and say that frozen lobster tails are in any way shape or form equally as delicious as fresh shucked meat?  Oh No You Diin’t

oh-no-you-didnt

If stating that frozen lobster tails are just as delicious as fresh shucked lobster meat for your lobster rolls wasn’t enough wait ‘til you see what they use for ingredients-

There isn’t just one strike on their ingredient list, there are five, count ‘em five!

Among the list of ingredients on the Mrs Joey C lobster roll banned ingredients list which the author uses-

  • 1 – 1-1/2 pound live lobster (a frozen tail works as well)
  • 1 lemon, cut into quarters
  • 1 tablespoon salt
  • 1 jalapeno, seeds removed, minced
  • 1 celery stalk, minced
  • 3 green onions, minced
  • 1/8 cup mayo
  • 1/4 fresh lemon, juiced
  • Salt for sprinkling
  • 4 hot dog buns
  • Butter

If you didn’t already know, the highlighted ingredients in her list are all no-nos.

I understand that some strange folk like celery (for the crunch), but jalefuckingpenos?  Jalepenos????  This just strikes me as another food writer’s attempt to differentiate their dish, but what they obviously don’t get is that the beauty of the classic lobster roll is it’s simplicity.

I guess you have to give these poor misguided women a pass with them living in California and all with all those other fruitcakes. 

They  do some things right, like buttering the hot dog rolls and grilling them so they get a 2 on a scale from 1-10.

To do the right job refer to this original post from The Mrs’ recipe-

For the proper way to prepare a lobster roll see this post-

Lobster Roll Ingredients

Worls Greatest Lobster Roll

Has to be Cains mayo, and hot dog rolls so you can grill them to a golden brown with the salted butter.

Notice there is no lettuce, paprika, celery or any other filler. If anything else appears in your lobster roll, you have an inferior lobster roll.

steam the lobsters and shuck the meat

tear the meat into 1/2 inch chunks or so and mix with cains mayo

refrigerate

once lobster and mayo is chilled, butter each side of cheap hot dog rolls (the kind you tear apart)

you do not want to use any goddamn baguette or crusty overpowering roll

you want white bread tear apart soft hot dog rolls

once you butter the sides of the hot dog rolls with SALTED butter you pan brown the roll so its warm and golden brown

just barely browned but the roll should still be very soft

then load up your cool lobster/mayo filling into the warm soft buttery roll and you have yourself the perfect lobster roll

note- NO  LETTUCE- NO  CELERY-NO  PAPRIKA- NO FANCY CRUSTY FRENCH ROLL

FOB Kevin Henry Has Been Taking Lessons

 

Joey, I’m not a food photographer, but I had to shoot the lobsta’ roll(s) Vanessa & I made yesterday !

Best,
Kevin

 

kevhenrylobroll

Looks like someone has been taking lessons from The Mrs on how to prepare the perfect lobster roll. Smile

  • The right type of roll- CHECK
  • No Celery, Lettuce or Paprika- CHECK
  • Light Mayo- CHECK

For the original post click da link-

How to F^@K Up a Lobster Roll -For The New Readers

Is the supermarket good for the Lobster Roll?

It is spring time and that means one thing to us all of us around here – Lobster Roll season is coming. Stay tuned for great places to get good rolls in the area. Check out what I found this week. A large local super market chain is selling a lobster roll in their fish section.  The price is $4.99 and the whole thing is refrigerated (bread and all). Honestly, it looked awful and I don’t know if I saw one piece of actual lobster. I started a rant in my head that I could go on and on about the art of the roll, why do people do this to good people, and on and on. Then I thought to myself –  Is offering a low priced option for the Lobster Roll a good thing overall? Will it inspire more folks to step up their game? Add a roll to their menu? Help me see the light on this, because I really want to rant on how this supermarket should stick to selling not so fresh fish….

Thanks – Patrick Ryan


What Does a $50 Lobster Roll Look Like???????

Via Grubstreet

“Last week, Ed’s Lobster Bar tweeted a photo of its white-truffle lobster roll, and we haven’t been able to stop drooling at the thought …….. The $50 roll is “the exact same as the regular [$27] lobster roll,” with the addition of three grams of white Alba truffles. “A little on the bottom, a little on top,” McFarland tells us.”

Does this thing look sick? Seriously, Ed from NYC have you lost your mind? It wasn’t enough to charge ill informed New Yorkers 27 bucks for a lobster roll, so you went with the old throw some expensive truffle on it since you are hedge fund rich trick!  I can’t believe this place won a Food Feud on TV. Why does the insanity continue with the Lobster Roll – Can’t anything be kept simple anymore? I want to film one of those Miller High Life Delivery Guy commercials where some Lobstermen come and take this guys lobsters away from him!

Sincerely – Patrick

 

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